Treasury Secretary Accused of Sexually Harassing Stack of $100 Bills

A pile of $100 bills has come forward to accuse U.S. Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin of inappropriately fondling it during a party at the Federal Reserve Bank headquarters in Washington D.C.  in March of this year.

The as-yet-unidentified currency issued a statement through a spokesperson detailing the “very uncomfortable” incident at a press conference in Washington today.

According to the statement, Mnuchin was “flirty” with the money during a Friday-night party for Federal Reserve staff. The Secretary then escalated the contact when he and the bills were alone in a small room away from the other partygoers later in the evening.

“Once alone in the room with the currency, Mr. Mnuchin pressed his body against the money,” the statement read. “He proceeded to grope several of the bills in the pile, rubbing them between his fingers inappropriately, panting, and even picking up scoops of the money and pulling them close to his face and chest while touching them with his tongue, wriggling his fingers and laughing diabolically.”

The money did not consent to the touching, the statement said, and felt “used and degraded” after the incident.

The accusations come just weeks after a similar charge was leveled against Mnuchin, alleging that he and his wife, actress Louise Linton, pressured a newly minted sheet of money into unwanted group sex in a coat closet of the Bureau of Engraving and Printing in Washington earlier this month.

Mnuchin faces older allegations as well, including from money involved in an incident in which he pushed millions of dollars profit from foreclosed mortgages into his genital area, allegedly threatening to report it to the FDIC if it refused to give him oral sex.