Apple Releases Same iPhone

In a move sure to delight consumers and shareholders alike, Apple introduced the iPhone Same today, a new model iPhone promoted as the same iPhone released last year. Apple CEO Tim Cook announced the product at a packed shareholder meeting at Apple headquarters. “We have created a product that is truly the next generation in sameness,” he said. “Seventeen years ago we brought Apple into the 21st century. Now, we’re staying there.”

Thus far, reviews of the iPhone Same have been positive, with even naysayers reporting they appreciate the lack of change. “This is Apple doing what Apple already does best,” enthuses tech blogger Slocum Bertram. “From the sleek identical design to the unchanged iconic logo, iPhone Same is everything consumers have come to expect from the iPhone they currently have.”

Packed with a suite of familiar features, the new iPhone boasts an intuitive interface that Apple devotees are sure to find they’re already learned. Its impressive photo lens takes pictures with a precedented level of clarity, its processor works fine, and it gets email.

“The iPhone Same is a bold, previous horizon—an ever-before broken-through breakthrough that is literally a reinvention of the iPhone itself,” Cook said to thunderous applause.

The iPhone Same retails for just $100 more than the identical previous model iPhone, although current iPhone owners will have the option to pay $50 to continue using the phone they already have.

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